There are 61 days until Nick's graduation and 75 until I am a retired teacher...and that's counting the weekends. We began this week more closely resembling slugs, and the week couldn't have ended more eventfully. Plans completely turned upside down, and our entire future just took a drastic turn toward Waco. While Nick has long embraced this idea, Iiiii have shown a range of hesitation from being perfectly fine with it to being perfectly against it. Last night I cried, as Oprah calls it, the ugly cry. This morning I was okay with moving, bordering on perfectly fine with moving. This evening I'm feeling overwhelmed looking around at all of our STUFF and imagining the packing...so the pendulum of wanting/not wanting to move is swinging like a trapeze in the Lubbock wind. Lubbock, however, is not going to happen.
We are in for a lot of changes over the next several months. I hope I maintain patience and strength and that I get to a place where I am as ecstatic as Nick is about moving. I see things differently than he does and I'm just not completely psyched yet. Another stepping stone move might be necessary which makes for inevitable moves and I'm exhausted just thinking about it. I hold firm to the ideas that everything happens for a reason and that everything will work out in the end. In the meantime, I cannot guarantee how I'll feel about it all right now.
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